The Tale of Mistress Izzy

I Honestly don’t have that much experience with being a dom. Before Slave A. I had never been in a dom-sub relationship. I never felt the need to read ’50 shades of Grey’. And coming across porn videos in which women get beaten by muscular men who don’t really seem to enjoy what they are doing was all I knew about bdsm, dominance, etc. It always seemed like something weird, something that wouldn’t really suit me. And since I had only been exposed to women being dominated I thought that was the role I was supposed to fit in, if I were to experiment.

Honestly I don’t really remember how the bdsm- conversation between me and Slave A. started. But I remember I felt a little scared. No idea what was expected of me and also scared that our relationship might not work out if I didn’t like it. Unlike me he does have past experience. But I tried being open-minded and I was willing to try it out. If I didn’t like it, at least I would have tried it and knowing what you don’t like is as important as knowing what you do like. And I had complete trust in Slave A. that he wouldn’t make me do anything I wouldn’t feel comfortable with.

And to me own surprise I liked it, more than liked it even. I like the control I have and I like the trust that we have in each other. My slave can trust me and I can trust him. We are both people that worry a lot and have a lot of things going on in our minds.

I have a lot of issues with insecurity and body image. But when we are playing I actually feel sexy and wanted. As much as I control my slave at that point he also takes care me. I don’t have to worry about being insecure or not looking my best. The only thing I have to do at that point is let myself be taken care of by my slave. For once I can put myself first without me feeling guilty about it. During the time that we’re playing I don’t have to worry about myself, I just have to take care of my slave. And I have complete control over what happens, and that is an amazing feeling.

I don’t have all the power though. We he says stop I have to stop. If I had enough then it’s done. If one of us doesn’t want to do something, we don’t do it. It is not just about the spanking (although those are very fun!) it’s about so much more than that!

I think equally as important as the caning and the spanking is the cuddles and the kisses afterwards. That balance is so incredibly important. I’m so happy that I tried this because it has restored so much of my confidence I thought I had lost. And it’s just so much fun. ;)